#TYT: Treat Yourself Thursdays

Sis,

When is the last time that you spent a little time on yourself? Not just scrolling Insta or TikTok, but tuning in to you? Lemme guess, you don't have the time, right?

After coming home from long commutes and needing a few minutes before answering texts, requests, and calls, I started this idea. With my daily roundtrip commute being 5 hours plus the 9-hour workday, sometimes I would get in the house and only have enough time to quickly eat and then go to bed. We’re not even gonna get into the sleep schedule, ‘cause umm…. what sleep?!

So I started taking back five minutes each day when I got home or on the ride back to the house to re-center my mind and check in with my feelings. I decided that Thursdays were going to be my day to check out for a bit. This morphed into a weekly time block on Thursdays where I can indulge in the things that actually feed my soul. The goal was to cultivate gratitude for the things I have and a reminder to fill my cup first in any way possible.

Here are a couple of activities I love to do during this time:

• Read books/articles I’ve “been meaning to finish”

• Home manicures and steaming my face

• Lighting one of my favorite candles and journaling

• GOING TO BED EARLY ( sounds weird, I know, but try it)

• Watching a favorite movie or TV show

• Working out! A little sweat = a reset on my day.

• Baking something (lemon anything does the trick)

• Watering my plants

Now it's your turn! Here's how to create your own TYT ritual/process:

Set the Scene:

Where can you relax or tend to yourself? As a kid, I hid in the closet I shared with my sister to find a little slice of quiet to read a chapter in one of my library books. Nowadays, I carve out space on our couch or sit on the front porch. A few great places for getting zen:

• Bedrooms

• Bathrooms

• Living Rooms

• Balconies

• A gym or outdoor space

• Coffee shops

• The beach

How Much Time Can You Spare?

At first, I could only spare 10 minutes and even that seemed like a long period of time to use. Now, I clock out from my day at 7:00 PM on Thursdays and the rest of the night is mine. It took YEARS to get to this point, so take it slow building out enough time for yourself. You might only need 15 minutes, and on other days you might need an hour. Just make time.

Pick A Scent:

Candles, flowers, incense, Oreos... whatever gets you ready to relax, make sure that scent is present. Another great way to get the scent you like is to take a shower with whatever body wash you have. Here are a few other ideas:

• Essential oils: Lavender is a great one

• Favorite snack/tea/ cup of coffee

• Fresh air: A little outside coming inside is nice, especially if you've had the windows closed for a long time.

Sound:

A good song can help shed the day's stresses, so cue up your favorite song. If you don't have a playlist already made, here are a few of my favorites on Spotify:

If you're unsure of where to start, that's aight. Here's a 5-minute #TYT Exercise anyone can do:

• Find a comfortable spot where you can sit undisturbed for at least 5 minutes. Put one hand on your stomach, close your eyes, and do 5 deep breaths in and out.

• Do a body scan: check the areas of your body where you're holding tension. Drop those shoulders, unclench your jaw, and loosen up your neck. Tension doesn't pay rent, so it shouldn't live in your body. (Especially if it's not chipping in on the water bill...)

• Finish by writing down or listing out loud 5 things you’re grateful for (can range from mundane to big things). This doesn't have to be lengthy at all, and I've put "I'm grateful that sweet potato fries exist". While you're listing things, keep in mind the way they make you feel and pay attention to what you've written down. You don't have to stop at 5 things, so feel free to keep going as long as you like.

Part of being a Dope Auntie is figuring out how to recharge and renew yourself, even when it feels like that's the last thing you have time to do. Remember that you are JUST as important as the littles you love on and by demonstrating how you care for yourself, you give them permission to advocate for their own well-being.

Signed,

A Dope Auntie